After 1 year exactly of travel, we are filled with emotion. Maybe one of the biggest is : Where has all the time gone?”

With Kristi’s permission here are her reflections when we came out of Asia and almost through Europe.

She had so many so I told her to write them down. She did so and now what a great time to publish them, exactly 12 months from taking off in Auckland.

Reflections of traveling – Kristi Walker

Ian & I have been chatting a lot lately about our feelings thus far on the trip.  We left our jobs about 11 months ago, left New Zealand exactly a year ago today and have been in SE Asia for almost exactly 6 months and Europe for nearly 4.  When we took this trip we mainly wanted to have more time together, I wanted to see the world and we wanted this opportunity to take a chance on a dream instead of always doing what our jobs and our responsibilities dictated.  Now, at this point, we’ve reflected on a lot and feel like we have changed our priorities, learned some good lessons and do not want to slip back into the same routine and expectation without keeping these tidbits!  We decided I would write them all down so they could go in the blog. Really the blog and this is just a journal for us to reflect back on, but anyone reading will also get an inside glimpse into our thoughts too.  So these are notes to myself and Ian really.  Putting this on the world wide web is interesting and makes me feel vulnerable but it’s a good exercise in not worrying about what other people think. 

Firstly, the amount of gratitude we have for this entire experience and even our lives up to now makes us want to burst.  Going all the way back to gratitude for amazing careers at Daimler that brought us together in the first place, put us on a good financial footing to allow us to move to New Zealand then take the risk of traveling the world and for giving us a taste of everything the world has to offer.  In my 15 years with Daimler I had the opportunity to go to every single continent except Antarctica with the company and Ian wasn’t far behind me in his 20+ years with them.  We have gratitude for our doTERRA business and all of the awesome people who have joined us on that journey – it’s really given us a like-minded community, awesome friends, powerful tools and the financial security to fund this awesome year. We have unmeasurable gratitude for each other and our children.  We may have found each other fairly late in life, but I think that makes us appreciate what we have even more, including our 3 awesome & crazy kiddos.  Lara has had the hardest time on this journey, missing friends, school, being hot and venturing way outside of her comfort zone with food, culture, poverty and sleeping arrangements!  However, she has had a great attitude most days, has continued to do well in school, has helped a TON with her brothers, has been a joy to have around and occasionally we see glimpses of lessons learned about big world issues and that makes us really proud!  The boys are just energetic toddlers happy to follow along as long as mommy & daddy are there.  We are grateful that they haven’t had major illnesses, accidents and for the most part, have eaten and slept pretty well!  They have learned to swim, learned to really talk and even at 2 have shown growth in cultural awareness – learning to say thank you in multiple languages and even telling Nana (in their own way) about how the Champa people thought the water of the mountain was holy so they poured it on the alter rather than sacrificing. Of course, they couldn’t communicate quite all of that detail, but I hadn’t even realized they were listening to the tour guide!!  We are grateful that we had the GUTS to follow our dreams.  I can’t tell you how many people have told us they wish that they could do that or that they are living vicariously through us and I just want to shout from the rooftops to do it.  Life is short and we are so thankful that we took this opportunity.

So lessons learned, and the real reason I’m writing this…  So we can hold each other accountable when we get back to the “real world” with mortgages, jobs, schools, college, consumerism, politics, convenience, etc.  These are some things we want to implement when we get back:

• Consume WAY less.
  • Have a smaller house – all those cupboards just fill with junk, there is more space to clean and more space to waste energy on in a world where we should try to conserve.
  • Have nice clothes, but WAY fewer.  We should have lots of empty room in our closet.
  • Significantly reduce the use of plastic.  Recycling does notreplace reduction in use.  Often it ends up in landfills around the world anyway plus it takes energy to recycle.  Better to just reduce by buying in bulk, using linen produce/bulk bags, using canvas shopping bags, buying from a bakery or market, making your own food, etc.
  • Put a veggie garden in again!  We loved our first veggie garden and it enabled us fresh, organic produce with no packaging which was delicious!
  • Give gifts of time and experiences rather than things.  There are honestly not many things we need in life anymore.
  • Eat vegan twice a week – the environmental impact of the meat industry leaves something to be desired, plus it’s good for us to have lots of veggies occasionally! PS – Lara is not thrilled about this, but has already researched tons of recipes of snacks and things she can take for lunch!

• Don’t be a slave to a mortgage.
  • Financial freedom provides general FREEDOM.  
  • We won’t feel trapped in a job and can actually just do what we enjoy if we don’t have to pay a giant mortgage payment.
  • We want to continue to have the freedom to travel.  Whether it’s just a long holiday or doing long term travel again when Lara graduates high school and the reality is that it will be a lot easier if we can just lock up & leave our house without worrying about renters or a mortgage.
  • This also gives us the freedom to traverse between New Zealand and the USA which we really appreciate because both places are home to us and we want to be able to come and go as we feel needed or wanted.
  • Be grateful for the minute that we are living when we’re living it.
  • We have had extraordinary lives and looking back we are grateful, but sometimes in the moment, we didn’t feel grateful or content.  When we traveled the world with Daimler, we would complain about being gone all the time. When we lived in NZ we saw and enjoyed a lot of things, but often we were looking more forward to “tomorrow” than the moment we were in.  We have learned on this trip to live in the moment more and be content.  Get up early and take the boys fishing, soak in that sunset even if it means staying up a little late for the kids, enjoy the rain because it is making thing green and cool, enjoy driving Lara all over the place because that time is precious and in a few years she will be gone, enjoy our work because it isn’t mandatory but is something we are choosing to do, be grateful for the little things.  
  • We started going around the table each night and saying what we are grateful for, we want to keep that up.  It’s fun to see what each person says too!  On the Gili Islands this was driven home for us when our hosts told us after the earthquake they ran out of their house, crossed the path, turned around and their house collapsed in front of their eyes.  They didn’t have even a flicker of anger, disappointment or sadness.  They said they were so thankfulthey got out in time.
  • Don’t worry or spend excessive amounts of time thinking about the future.  We have worked so hard to put ourselves in a good financial position and made so many choices thinking what is best FOREVER and the reality is that nothing stays the same forever, so we want to make more decisions when we have to.  In the meantime, we want to enjoy things as they are.  
  • Practice contentment.  This means removing some things from our vocabulary like “I can’t wait until…”, “When…” and “Should we…” amongst others I am sure.  We are notorious for dreaming up the next best thing when we are actually currently living the best thing.  J
  • Enjoy our own backyards!  New Zealand and the USA have so much to offer that we don’t always need to go far to have a holiday, relax or experience something amazing!
  • Suffice this to say that there will definitely be more international travel on our horizon, but while Lara is in the tight schedule of high school we want to spend more time in our own backyards.  We don’t want to waste time & money getting to other areas of the world.  We also recognize the immense environmental impact of flights and while it is not going to stop us from flying, we recognize that every little choice we make in all areas of life does make a difference.
  • We want to camp more!  We had such an amazing time camping in Utah on our USA leg that we want to keep it up. It’s such a good way to spend time with the kids, save money, be eco-friendly, see places and make memories.
  • When we tell people that we live in New Zealand, undoubtedly the most common two responses are “you are so lucky, we have always wanted to go to NZ” and “oh, I went there once and it was my favorite place”.  The US also has equally beautiful places like the stunning national parks – we need to remember the grass isn’t greener anywhere else.  And my stomach likes America & New Zealand!!
  • Be present.
  • Reduce social media use.  I’ve started by putting a timer on social media apps on my phone already and love it. I am aiming to reduce that even further although it is hard right now because a lot of our doTERRA work is on social media.  When I get back I want to have more set work hours while the boys are in preschool so I can be more efficient and control my time better.
  • For Ian, who is going to go back into office-based work, we’ve discussed leaving the phone in the car Friday night until Sunday night so at least on the weekends he can be totally switched off.  He was a slave to email round the clock as long as I’ve known him, partially justified because he worked with people in time zones all over the world, but that’s not the life we want any more.  He has LOVED having so much time with the kids (he calculated it to be about 3,000 extra hours with the kids not working this year) so we want to prioritize that while recognizing our desire for him also to work.
  • We’ve struggled off and on during this trip with full-time parenting. It isn’t always easy! However, we have learned all of our kids are all better (behaved and happier) when we engage with them versus trying to multi-task.  Multi-tasking needs to go by the wayside for our family…
  • We only have 5 more years with Lara at home after this trip, it’s going to be gone in the blink of an eye.  This is our last chance to not only spend so much time with her, but probably more importantly, to instill the values, unconditional love, skills and self-love that we want her to take into the big world when she graduates.
  • Date nights! We’ve actually been really blessed to have lots of date days and nights because of where we’ve stayed in SE Asia. We have loved it and it has made Ian & I better parents, allowed us to make level-headed decisions together, regroup, discuss parenting strategies and just have fun.  We need to keep this up as we didn’t have enough dates in our old life.
  • Mindful parenting
  • Our children watch and absorb every-single-thing-we-say and do.  Let’s set the best example ever for them!
    • This includes simple things like just being kind to everyone, giving people the benefit of the doubt, not complaining, speaking nicely, not swearing, not drinking alcohol regularly, refraining from judging, monitoring our own electronic use, praying in front of our children, reading in front of our children.  Really all of it, we were reminded by the holy water story that those little eyes, ears, hearts, brains, and souls are always open and we need to be cognizant of what we put in.
  • The way we raise our children will stick with them for life and come out when they are adults and when they are parents.  Some of us weren’t raised in families that intuitively make us amazing, patient, loving parents so let’s make sure we give that to our children.
  • They aren’t giving us a hard time, they are having a hard time.
  • Remember the emotional backpack – we all have it and it can be emptied with LAUGHTER (or crying or date night).
  • Nothing else really matters but God, our family, our ethics and our happiness.
  • This is hard to put into words really.  It’s probably the biggest thing for me that I’ve even struggled to articulate to Ian but thankfully he knows what I mean and agrees.  It makes me feel so light.  Physically light in my chest, because I don’t have the weight of the world and other’s expectations on my shoulders.  I am a pleaser by nature and have always done what I thought was “right”, always put pressure on myself to do what I was expected to do (and often it was only my own expectations not what others actually expected of me) and always been responsible often at the risk of burnout.  I’ve rediscovered on this journey that basically, we are blessed beyond measure and we should prayerfully do what is best, not necessarily what is our responsibility, what someone else thinks is “normal” or worry about what others will think.  God has a plan and purpose for us, it is our job to walk His path, not worry about it. It is our job to raise our kids to be conscientious, loving, accepting, humble yet confident human-beings.  We have a loving marriage that honestly many only dreams about, we need to always prioritize that because it will give us a best friend for life and give our children a secure family into their adulthood. We need to breathe life and positivity into our family and also everyone else.  The Golden Rule should be practiced all day every day, nobody really enjoys a Debbie Downer plus there are enough people pulling others down that I would rather our family build each other and others up.  People are literally starving around the world – it is not just something we see on an infomercial trying to get us to adopt a child around the world.  We have literally seen people starving, they are literally eating out of dumps – none of the other stuff in life really matters.  We need to occasionally give some things up just to remember how blessed we are.  We need to look at things and question whether it is excess – whether it is environmentally excessive or just gluttonous (like his & her closets in a house we looked at).  We need to check-in on ourselves and see if we are practicing gratitude, praying, being positive and feeling content.  We need to volunteer in our own communities, people are probably hungry there too.

• Randomness
  • Don’t slip into consumerism – do we really need it or is it just something to do/play with then get bored of?  Is there something we would rather do with that money?  Tell the kids NO to stuff.
  • Don’t get into habits that are either bad for us or cost money – leave coffees out as a treat, rather than a daily habit.  Save a glass of wine as a Friday night treat, rather than a daily habit.  Save a family dinner out as something we will all enjoy not just a square to fill or laziness because we don’t want to cook.
  • Prioritize paying off the mortgage if we have one.
  • See new parts of America and those we love!  Hawaii, Yellowstone, Glacier, New York City, Orlando, Oregon, San Diego, and more!
  • Don’t get too lazy to get outside and enjoy life.  Yes, you might get sandy at the beach but it is so worth it!  It may be cool/rainy, put on a raincoat and take a walk on the trails by the beach.
  • Have family bike rides on the trails and ride our bikes to a restaurant for date night.
  • Have friends around a lot, we love it!
  • Enjoy doing laundry, it’s a blessing to have a washer & dryer!!
  • Don’t compromise food quality again – eating high-quality food is good for the environment, good for our health and makes us feel better.  Try new recipes too while we’re at it!
  • When we do get frustrated with doTERRA, or Ian’s job (which is inevitable despite all of the lessons on positivity and gratitude), remember what it is affording us. doTERRA gives us total freedom, it has paid for this trip, it allows me to come & go between countries as I please, it takes the burden off of Ian to provide financially for us, it keeps me out of an office and is definitely worth the time & frustration.  Most importantly I have helped hundreds of people with their wellness empowerment, it has been amazing to see some of the results. 
  • Ian’s job may or may not be the same, but whatever it is, it will certainly be providing financially for our family for which we need to remain grateful.  We need to remember previous work he had that we really did not enjoy so remember that the grass isn’t greener on the other side, then with a level head decide whether a change is best for the family or not.